After a divorce, many families face the challenge of adjusting to new routines. One parent has found that buying duplicates of essential items can significantly reduce the stress experienced by children moving between two homes. This strategy has provided comfort for the author’s children, aged 11 and 13, who navigate life between their mother’s and father’s households.
Living out of bags can be a difficult adjustment for children. The author describes how the transition began five years ago, but this school year marked a new chapter. Both children developed a keen interest in personal grooming, specifically in styling their hair. This shift added complexity to the weekly routine, which already involved packing clothes, school supplies, and sports equipment.
With the new interest in hair care, packing became more cumbersome. The author realized that they were also transporting shampoos, conditioners, and perfumes each week. This led to the decision to purchase duplicates of favored products to ease the transition stress.
Creating Comfort in Uncertain Times
To provide stability, the author started buying two of everything necessary for their children’s grooming habits. For instance, they purchased a bottle of the Replica perfume for their daughter to keep at both homes. Additionally, they stocked up on hair products and body washes that the children loved. Knowing that their children have access to familiar scents plays a crucial role in easing the emotional burden of transitioning between homes.
As the children enter their teenage years, concerns about appearances can intensify. To help combat common skin issues, the author also provided extra moisturizers and pimple patches, ensuring the children had what they needed to feel confident. This attention to detail brings the author peace of mind, knowing that the children can maintain their routines, even in their father’s home.
Despite the benefits of this approach, challenges remain. The author acknowledges that not all items can be duplicated. For example, the family shares a single pair of Apple headphones and an iPad that travels back and forth. Clothes, shoes, and equipment are packed weekly, adding to the emotional weight of the transition.
Managing Emotional Transitions
The effort to pack for their children can be exhausting. At times, the author takes on this responsibility, understanding the emotional toll that the divorced-kid routine can have. The process of loading bags with essentials can be overwhelming, but the author prioritizes ensuring their children have everything they need.
While it is possible to coordinate with the children’s father or create shared shopping lists, the author has chosen to limit contact due to past conflicts. They believe that prioritizing the children’s needs is more important than maintaining a cooperative relationship with their ex-partner.
Each week, as the car is loaded, the author shares a moment with their children, filled with laughter, nostalgia, or positive affirmations. These small interactions help alleviate the pain of separation, even if just momentarily. As the children leave, the author experiences a mix of heartache and hope, knowing they are equipped with the items that contribute to their well-being.
Ultimately, the decision to invest in duplicates of personal care items serves as a testament to the author’s dedication to their children’s comfort and happiness during a challenging period in their lives. By focusing on these small comforts, the author not only helps ease the transition between homes but also fosters a sense of stability in an otherwise uncertain situation.
